Twenty

Fourteen years ago, I stepped into my very first Kindergarten classroom.  I was 23 years old, terrified and thrilled.  I had definitely found my fire!  The parents of those children looked skeptically at me, wondering aloud how “that young girl” was going to take care of and teach their babies.  On the first day of school, and every year after that, I was always overwhelmed by the sheer number of children.  Once we settled into our routine, it was no big deal, but the first day of school is a different story!  There’s something that happens when your class enrollment reaches twenty. 

 

                          Twenty small children (or 22, 24, 26…) is A LOT!!! 

 

This year, the first day of school will be very different for me.  After fourteen years of spending the first day of school with five and six year olds, I am beginning my internship as an Administrator at the high school level.  I am 37 years old, terrified and thrilled.  I am learning the customs, traditions, and language of a foreign country, one that has graciously accepted me as one of their own.  Again, I am looking for that spark that will send me along a blazing path.  On August 8, I expect to be overwhelmed once again by the sheer number of children…this time a school full of teenagers rather than a classroom of twenty or so little people. 

 

Still, I won’t be able to help but wonder what’s going on in Kindergarten.  That magical place.  The place where it all begins.  And, my prayers will be with Kindergarten teachers everywhere as they welcome “Twenty” to school for the very first time. 

 

Twenty by Emily Branch

20 is a lot...

20 parents to call
20 bus tags to make
20 names that are just that...names
20 mysteries to solve
20 sets of worried, protective, parental eyes to gaze into
20 steady gazes that say, "I've got this...Let me love him, let me help him grow..."

20 seeds to sow
20 malleable young minds, waiting and wondering
20 first hugs, some squeeze tight looking for acceptance, some timid, stiff, skeptical
20 tiny voices...."look at mine, teacher"
20 pairs of shoes to tie
20 first marks on their very first school paper...


20 dirty faces to count at the pumpkin patch...
20 times or more
20 into the wagon for the hayride
20 pumpkins to load into the truck
20 times to hear, “I notice something!”
20 first report cards
20 first loose teeth to pull…

20 cold, gray, rainy days stuck indoors
20 dedications to write inside the books given for Christmas
20 thank you cards to write for the precious mugs that say "Teacher"
20 jackets to zip up
20 runny noses
20 first times to truly read a word…

20 beautifully, breezy days playing outdoors
20 monkeys running wild through the zoo
20 pairs of shorts, now too small
20 noses buried in books
20 plaintive requests, "read some more"
20 writers...
20 readers...
20 thinkers......

20 yearbooks to sign
20 last report cards
20 favorite songs
20 tight, confident, familiar hugs
20 teary faces
20 goodbyes......
20 trembly voices, “I’ll miss you next year”
20 seeds sown.

20 is not very much.

Let's Set the World on Fire

Last night, I was completely blown away by the Petal High School Indoor Percussion Ensemble's Performance!  Trust me when I say that this is not something that you want to miss.  To the directors, crew, and musicians:  you truly "set the world on fire" with your send-off exhibition.  I have no doubt that you will "burn brighter than the sun" in Dayton, Ohio, this Friday.

Words cannot express how humbled I felt when Mr. Lymon shared that the words I wrote last Summer helped to inspire your show.  Surrounded by a few of my students, I watched you display your craft with so much energy, so much passion, so much FIRE, that goosebumps covered my skin, and my eyes filled with tears.  To imagine that I had any small part of the phenomenal art that you shared with the crowd is simply unfathomable.  

It's interesting to note that when I started this blog back during the summer, I was "on fire" for the new year to come. I had learned so many new things about teaching and learning, and I was literally burning with anticipation to begin teaching my new class.   My fire for teaching is like those blazing wildfires out West.  

              Unpredictable.  Unassailable.   Undaunted. 

I decided that starting a blog would be perfect for sharing all of the things that my students and I would be learning and experiencing everyday.  I envisioned myself blogging once or twice a week about our journey together, complete with photographs and student bloggers.  I built a fire beneath myself, and boy was it blazing!  

Well, let me tell you...left untended, a fire will sometimes burn out!  Somehow, in the midst of all the singing, talking, reading, laughing, painting, talking, writing, quarreling, dancing, talking, tree hugging, crying, counting, and - did I mention talking?- teaching, my blog was neglected.  Sure, I would think of it at midnight when I couldn't sleep, as if it were an ember waiting for me to come and stir the flame back to life.  But, there's just so much a girl can do in a day, so there it remained...buried...or so I thought.

Little did I know that this tiny spark had ignited a fire in Tony Lymon, drummer extraordinaire, and that like an Olympic torch bearer, he was passing the flame on to each of you, and that you would soon use it to literally Ignite the World.  (For those of you who don't know, the PHS Indoor Percussion Ensemble competes this Friday, April 19, in Dayton, Ohio, in the Scholastic Division of the WORLD Class Championships.  I learned last night that there are only twenty ensembles on the planet who qualify for this elite division, and, yes, PHS is home to one of these.)

What thrills me most about this story is that the words displayed on your screen last night:

One spark can change a room...

And, if a spark can change a room, it can change a city...

And, if a spark can change a city, it can change a state...

And, if a spark can change a state, it can change a nation...

And, if a spark can change a nation...

A SPARK CAN CHANGE THE WORLD!

...were justified.

You see, sometimes we start a fire with very well defined intentions.  We plot and plan tirelessly before ever daring to strike the very first match.   We collect the best fuel we can find, arrange and rearrange the components, and practice for every conceivable scenario.  We seek permission from the Fire Marshall again and again, afraid of taking a step in the wrong direction.  When we finally find the courage to light the flame, we tend that fire in every way possible.  We consult fire management experts and spend hours researching the best way to make our fire grow and fulfill whatever goal we have set for it.  We plan and plot tirelessly to ensure that the fire does exactly what the manuals say it should do. We talk ourselves out of taking too many risks with the fire in fear that we might burn down the whole house!  But, somehow, in all of this planning and plotting, our original passion can often be extinguished.  We find ourselves stomping out other fires that have ignited all around us while we were preoccupied, reducing "our fire" to a formula that we could manage comfortably.  We end up tired... burned out... We become fire fighters rather than flame igniters, focused on keeping the fire contained rather that letting it do what fires are meant to do.

To me, the best, the most beautiful, the most powerful fire is the one we don't even know we set.  The one that began with the tiny spark of a brilliant idea.  The one that rages out of control.  

        Unpredictable.  Unassailable.  Undaunted.

As I watched your show unfold last night, I was reminded yet again about how truly easy it is to make an impact.  One person literally can impact the world.  The catch is, more often than not, it's not usually in the way we planned.  And the bonus is, our impact often comes back to us on a much larger scale than we ever anticipated, just as that tiny spark did for me last night.

Jeremiah 20:9 says, "His word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot."  On Friday, my Kindergarten class and I will be watching from Petal as you let go of the spark within.  Don't hold anything back!  Release the fire inside of you, and let it Ignite the World.  Please know that 24 bright and shining children will be cheering you on and singing:

Tonight......

We are young....

So let's set the world on fire...

We can burn brighter....

Than the sun!

Making a Brighter Day

At 9:15 a.m. On Friday, December 14, I posted a video of my Kindergarten class singing "We are the World".  We've spent the past month learning about other cultures and different holidays that are celebrated in America and around the world.  

We live in a small, close-knit community where we enjoy an amazing sense of family, but where exposure to those who are different than we are is often limited.  My hope for this unit was that my students would come to understand that although people all over the world are different, we are a part of one big family.  I want them to learn to not only tolerate diversity, but to appreciate it and consider it a strength.  Ultimately, I want them to learn to show love to others....ALL others.

Later in the day on Friday, I learned that during the same minutes when my children had their arms around each other singing, "We are the ones who'll make a brighter day", other children and teachers were dying in Newtown, Connecticut.  

                                    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

It's difficult to explain all of the emotions this national tragedy has evoked...disbelief and horror that anyone could be capable of killing young children, sadness and empathy for the parents, anger at the thought of someone threatening my sons or my students, relief that my sons and my students are safe, guilt for feeling that way....

Most of all, I feel helpless.  

I want to DO something...anything...something.... 

I hear the broadcasters and the activists arguing about gun laws, safety procedures, and metal detectors.  But, when will we talk about the real problems, not just the symptoms?  How long will it take us to realize that we are attempting to heal a gaping wound with a tiny bandaid?

Being the mother of two boys, I've often remarked that boys especially are compelled to do two things:  build and destroy.  My boys have spent hours over the years building Lego structures, sand castles, tree houses and forts, only to destroy or abandon them once they were completed.  Within these behaviors, I believe, lies a key to healthy social and emotional development.

In her book, Teacher, Sylvia Ashton-Warner, writes about the two "vents" that people possess: the creative and the destructive.  She suggests that both of these vents are expressive, and that if we can steer children towards the creative, then the destructive will atrophy, much like a muscle does when it isn't used. 

 Children can learn how much better it feels to build than to destroy through emergent, self-directed play that allows them to experience the natural consequences of their actions, without adults who swoop in to save them from learning from their mistakes.  But, what CAN adults do? 

Model...model....model.  Play alongside and with children, modeling creative expression and cooperative behaviors.  Remember, children don't listen to what we say, they watch what we do.  God has placed within all animals the instinct to imitate adults.  If children see us expressing love, they will as well. 

And so, I know what to do.  I will continue teaching boys and girls...not only how to read, write, and solve math problems, but how to create, and more importantly, how to love others...ALL others.

"We are the world.

We are the children.

We are the ones who'll make a brighter day,

So let's start giving.

There's a choice we're making.

We're saving our own lives.

It's true, we'll make a better day,

Just you and me."

This Little Light of Mine, I'm Gonna Let It Shine

Finding your fire is an amazing, life changing gift, but it does come with strings attached.  In the early 1600s, St. Ignasius gave this directive, "Go forth and set the world on fire." Once you've found your fire, you then have a responsibility to use it to bring light to those who haven't.

Yesterday, we had Kindergarten Registration at our school.  All summer, I've been wondering about my students and their parents.  Who are they?  What will they be like?  What kinds of things will they be most interested in?  Finally, I was able to put faces with names and get a quick glimpse into what makes all of these precious children and their parents tick.  I learned about the hopes and dreams of my students, who are just beginning the journey that will someday lead them to Colleges and Careers.

I consoled parents as they cried over turning over their very hearts to me as their children begin their first "big school" experiences.  During these conversations, I was constantly asking myself, "How am I going to hook this child?  How can I help this child find his fire?"

The great philosopher, Socrates, had a lot to say about this.

"To find yourself, think for yourself."

Now, I think it would be highly unusual, though not impossible, for five year olds to discover their callings in life...to find their fire.  But, I know what they can discover:  a passion and a love for learning, a thirst for knowledge that remains unquenchable.  And so, this is my job as a Kindergarten teacher: to awaken the desire to KNOW in my students.  Even though they may call me "teacher," I really can't teach them anything.  I can only make them think.

"Wisdom begins in wonder."

This is the easy part of my job, because young children wonder about everything!  They ask a million questions.  God has gifted them with a natural inquisitiveness.  My job as a parent or a teacher is to nurture that curiosity rather than discourage it.   If you're an adult and you find that you don't wonder about anything anymore, I urge you to search for your inner child.  Reawaken the gift of curiosity that God placed in all of us.

"True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we know about life, ourselves, and our world."

Here's when it becomes more challenging.  In my role as a Kindergarten teacher,  I must provide experiences so that students realize that the universe is huge!  Then, students need to begin to explore the ways in which they can matter in the midst of this enormity, the ways in which they can make a difference.   These are the very first steps along the journey of Finding Your Fire.  At Petal Primary, we can often be overheard saying, "The more we learn, the more we realize all that we don't know." If you or your child has that feeling, celebrate it!  Rest assured that true learning is taking place!

And, now, my favorite Socrates quote of all...

"Education is the kindling of a flame, not the filling of a vessel."

This one gives me goosebumps.  We have all been gifted with a vessel - a mind - that has infinite capacity, something that science can never measure.   (Always remember that we are made in His image!)  If I approached teaching as filling a vessel, one would never be able to tell that I had ever done anything to make a difference.  The few drops of knowledge that I might give to students are nothing when compared with this vast reservoir.  Those drops could only be shared with a few other people.  And, how would I ever decide which drops are the most important for children to have?  How could I ever consider all of the science, art, and language in our world and say to myself, "I'm only going to teach this list of words, this tiny part of nature, and these few pieces of art?"  In a million years, we still wouldn't have time to learn everything there is to know about our universe, and teachers only have a little more than a decade before we consider our children "educated." Anyway, who am I to say what should go in the vessel?  Indeed, who are any of us?Attempting to fill these vessels, these minds, is not only arrogant, it's foolish.

But...imagine what could happen if I managed to kindle a flame!  A fire begins with a tiny spark, but it's ability to multiply and touch others is enormous.  Fire can consume everything it comes into contact with.  Fire brings light to the darkness.  THIS is my job, my calling.....to create a tiny spark, to show children  how to think, how to find out what they don't know, how to discover exactly what it is they even WANT to know, how to find their fire!  If I use my fire in this way, I can place the entire universe in children's hands.  Rather than telling them WHAT they need to know, I am showing them that they CAN know...they can know anything!  I am showing them HOW to know...Anything!

This is at the very heart of empowerment.  I am blessed to work in a school where I feel empowered.  If teachers themselves aren't empowered, they can never lead children in becoming empowered.  After all, we can't teach that which we don't know.  The word, 'empower' appears in the mission statements of most school districts.....

"The mission of the ________School District is to EMPOWER students...."

 If you really think about it, anything that comes after those words is superfluous.

"There is a candle in every soul,

Some brightly burning, some dark and cold.

So, carry your candle.

Run to the darkness.

Seek out the hopeless, confused, and torn.

Take your candle,

And Go light your world!" -----Chris Rice

Find you Fire, Sugar!

Recently, a good friend of mine recommended that I read the book, Saving CeCe Honeycutt, by Beth Hoffman.  In the book, one of the main characters, Oletta, gives twelve-year-old Cece this advice:  "Everyone needs to find the one thing that brings out her passion.  It's what we do and share with the world that matters.  I believe it's important that we leave our communities in better shape than we found them.  Far too many people die with a heart that's gone flat with indifference, and it surely must be a terrible way to go.  Life will offer us amazing opportunities, but we've got to be wide awake to recognize them.  If there's one thing I'd like most for you, it's that you'll find your calling in life.  That's where true happiness and purpose lies.  You've got to find your fire, sugar.  You'll never be fulfilled if you don't.  How do you know what your fire is?  Oh, you'll know. One day you'll do something, or get an idea that seems to pop up from nowhere.  And you'll feel a kind of stirring--like a warm flicker inside your heart.  When that happens, whatever you do, don't ignore it.  Open your mind and explore the idea.  Fan your flame.  And when you do, you'll have found it." 

The expression "finding a calling" seems to come straight from the Bible, which is full of stories of individuals who answered God's call on their lives.  I believe that a true calling will allow you to make a positive difference in the lives of others.  Having found my calling in teaching early on in my life, I've always felt fulfilled.  Although our society, for the most part, doesn't consider teaching to be a very prestigious career, and while I don't bring home a six figure salary, I like going to sleep at night knowing that I did something that mattered with my day....knowing that I've found my fire. 

So, here's my question... Have you found your fire?  If you have, what is it?  Will it make a difference in the lives of others?  If you haven't found it, what are you waiting for?! Go out and find your fire, sugar!